This post will be updated as these incidents continue to unravel my heart. As a victim of gun violence at 15 years old, I cannot explain the terror I felt, even though I have tried. As a victim of double grand theft auto and grand larceny in recent years, my family has felt overwhelmingly violated. I know what it’s like to feel supported, but also unsupported and all alone when hell chases you down. I want to offer my support, my love, my tears, my voice, my musings, my presence, my kitchen, my home, a piece of my heart.

The following scriptures from Romans 12 are LIFE. This is Jesus. This is not religion. This is not a cult. This is not ritual. This is the path to a life of spiritual, relational, and personal peace. Real peace. Not just the peacekeeping kind, but the the PEACEMAKING kind that can prove painful and ugly, but carries the greatest reward I have ever known.

⁹ Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. ¹⁰ Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

¹⁵ Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.¹⁶ Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!

¹⁸ Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.

This way of LIFE includes being happy or rejoicing with those who are happy, even if it isn’t what you wanted. I have learned to not allow someone else’s joy ever add to my pain. Jealousy is difficult to uproot. But rejoicing with those who rejoice builds up my joy! I want to build up the joy in my life so that it outweighs any pain.

BUT this way of LIFE, also means weeping and mourning with those who weep. And that is the heart of what this post is all about. My heart feels a weakness when I see others in pain. When I feel their loss or sadness. I feel so helpless, but want to do something.

In her book “Braving the Wilderness” Brene Brown says this:

“I have started to believe that crying with strangers in person could save the world.”

“In person” is a must when possible. With strangers AND loved ones. Yes, it might, and will likely, be awkward. And no, I don’t have the perfect words to say. But that awkwardness and lack of the healing words – in person – carry so much love and kindness. To willingly play a fool to let others know that they are not alone is one of the greatest powers that we possess, but why are we so often afraid to just be human? To share in our humanity? We don’t have to be superhuman or supernatural – we just have to BE.

Some things are awful and we can easily slip into our own place of pain and fear and discomfort, even when it isn’t about us. For example, a funeral service with an open casket might make me uncomfortable, but it isn’t about me! And not showing up to support a friend or loved one means that the only thing I have accomplished is to have further isolated the person who is truly hurting, reeling, and affected by the pain of loss. My insecurity might only perpetuate their loneliness and hurt.

So what do we do if we want to weep with strangers, but are worlds away? I’m not sure that I have a good answer, but for me, I pray and meditate and try my best to let the sadness sink into my heart so that I might not forget. If there is action that I can take politically, a letter I can write, a note that I can send, or a sentiment that I can share, then I will.

And so I mourn with those who mourn and will continue to update this post as I do. Please feel free to add ANY MOURNINGS into the comments section below and I will mourn with you.

If you just need someone to be human with you, I’ve got you.

6/7/19 Detroit man is charged in the killing of 3 LGBTQ community members. The Wayne Country Prosecutor’s Office said that the killer targeted the three victims “strictly on their being part of the LGBTQ community. We must remain vigilant in our fight to eradicate hate in Wayne County and beyond.” “This case illustrates the mortal danger faced by members of Detroit’s LGBTQ community, including transgender women of color.” Fair Michigan President Alanna Maguire. 5 transgender women have been murdered in Detroit in 2019. I mourn with those who mourn.

5/4/19 Rachel Held Evans, a fierce defender of an inclusive gospel, passed away. She had created space, and hope, for evangelicals questioning the institutions of their faith and she championed the voices and experiences of others, especially those whose voices were ignored or marginalized in the Church. I mourn with those who mourn.

4/30/19 University of North Carolina at Charlotte – an gunman enters a classroom and opens fire, killing two and critically wounding several others. I mourn with those who mourn.

4/27/19 A gunman opened fire on a Poway Synagogue in California, killing one person and injuring three more. It was the last day of Passover — Lori Gilbert Kaye threw herself in front of the synagogue’s rabbi and saved his life. I mourn with those who mourn.

4/21/19 A series of coordinated bombings on Easter Sunday rocked Sri Lanka churches and hotels, killing at least 253 people and wounding 500 others. I mourn with those who mourn.

4/17/19 A girlfriend who suffered horrific abuse by her ex-husband lost her court battle as the jury found him not guilty. Not that he was innocent, but they couldn’t say beyond a reasonable doubt that he was guilty. This is why victims stay silent. This is why they don’t go to the police. They fight so hard. Often for nothing. And she still has more trials and a civil trial to go through. She is afraid for her life and seeking a PPO. I mourn with those who mourn.

4/15/19 Notre Dame de Paris goes up in flames. A nation loses a cherished piece of their history that stood for 850 years. I mourn with those who mourn.

3/26/19 4/2/19 4/4/19 Three historically black churches have burned in less than two weeks in the south Louisiana St. Landry Parish, north of Lafayette. Yes, it is sad for a people to lose their place of worship and community and history. And it looks like arson, possible hate crimes. I mourn with those who mourn.

3/15/19 Gunmen kill 51 people during Friday prayers at two mosques in Christchurch in the country’s worst ever attack. I mourn with those who mourn.